Auto Stratos Holiday

It was good of Bob to come clean and tell me it was a trick.

"Cant say I am too keen on this one Grounddiver"

"But you told me you had instrument rating"

"£45 for 6000 your having a laugh let me out".

"Look here Grounddiver its a bloody pea souper Ive never seen fog like it".

"Tislock it is then, Colin,s Fitzmaurice is cheaper mmmm...''

OK OK £16

"Pull back on that bloody stick man", as the gardeners fork shot through the cockpit window we realised we had overshot the runway.

"Open up that Lycoming and take me to 6000..................."

"Holy sh** THE Ba***** wont level out shes still climbing".

"Looks like that fork damaged a control line".

Heared the pilot rant something about 22000 feet and he wanted another £14 when i jumped. He was never seen again.

Now here is the clever bit, I could not believe it when Bob told me, but you do not actually hide behind the cloud.

You take with you a large training canopy release it behind the cloud and fly off away from the DZ.

You then shack up in a hotel or B&B for a night or so and reappear on the DZ a while later, Bob said dont leave it too long as it has to be convincing.

"Double egg Mr Groundiver"

"Yes please"

It was my 3rd week in Drop Anchor B & B in Scarborough.

I left the aircraft at 9am on March 3rd and arrived on the DZ at 2pm on April 1st.

The crowd had stood there for the whole 4 weeks, one said he was bursting for a piss.

I heared a shout from the crowd, "**ck*ng spiders he as even put on a pair of polished brogues and changed his jumpsuit".

Always expect the unexpected especialy when you least expect it.