After all the disasters so far I have decided that the only way to be certain of a canopy that opens is to start with it open. (the parascend)

Plan No.5 I ran this idea by a couple of friends who seemed to not want to get involved.

It was then that another brain wave struck. A solo operated hoist and ride machine.

Components Required.


  1. Position car opposite tree roughly 200yds
  2. Jack up car remove offside rear wheel and replace with tyreless spare.
  3. Remove valve and pass end of wire through hole and tie a large knot to secure.
  4. Take other end of rope, tub of marge and pass rope around the tree Liberally lubricating with marge to minimise friction.
  5. Walk back over to car, secure other end of wire with dog lead clip to rig harness.

The Theory

Your canopy opens in the wind behind you.
The car is left in top gear the accelerator wedged to the floor.
You lean through the window start the engine retracting your arm sharpish.
Wire winds around car wheel at a serious rate of knots, after a short jog man takes to the sky, releasing dog lead clip as required altitude is reached.

Here is what happened.

I decided leaning through the window to be a little risky to my arm.
So I left open the door, started the engine as planned.
The speed I set off was phenomenal, immediately my canopy snagged the car door and ripped to shreds.
My chin dug into the grass and I headed on my fateful journey towards the tree, 15 cowpats, a slap on the forehead from a mudflap and I'm riding the alfresco tumble drier. 6 gallons of petrol 168000 revolutions later.

I managed to escape the hoist.

Back to the drawing board.